I’ve read more iPad reviews than I care to remember over the last couple of days, but luckily, not all of them have been gushy, fan boi reviews *looks over at Pogue, Mossberg and co.*
i.e. crap like [no offence, @amandamli] this from LineHive:
iPad reviews from 6 of the most popular publications: general agreement that it’s a new paradigm. http://linehive.com/show/207
So, without further adieu, here are some real [by real, I mean anti-iPad reviews that bring a smile to kittens across the globe] reviews.
Note that I’m probably bastardising these reviews by pulling out a paragraph or so from them, so please do go read them!
I tweeted earlier that after having slept with her (Ms. iPad), I woke up with morning-after regrets. She’s sweet and pretty but shallow and vapid.
Cute line, appropriate for retweets. But as my hangover settles in, I realize that there’s something much more basic and profound that worries me about the iPad — and not just the iPad but the architecture upon which it is built. I see danger in moving from the web to apps.
Let’s just be honest for a second. What need does the iPad deliver on? What consumer problem does it solve? The answer to both is nothing. It’s essentially a bright shiny Apple object and that’s exactly why you’ll buy it. However, what I think you’ll find is that just like so many other bright shiny objects, you’ll be bored with it fairly quickly. Unless of course you’re a 3 year old; then you’ll love it and never want to put it down.
Gadgets come and gadgets go. The iPad you buy today will be e-waste in a year or two (less, if you decide not to pay to have the battery changed for you). The real issue isn’t the capabilities of the piece of plastic you unwrap today, but the technical and social infrastructure that accompanies it.
If you want to live in the creative universe where anyone with a cool idea can make it and give it to you to run on your hardware, the iPad isn’t for you.
If you want to live in the fair world where you get to keep (or give away) the stuff you buy, the iPad isn’t for you.
If you want to write code for a platform where the only thing that determines whether you’re going to succeed with it is whether your audience loves it, the iPad isn’t for you.
I promised a verdict, so here it is. With the caveat that it’s after one day and I reserve the right to change it at any time: Today’s iPad, the one that I just bought, is just a demo of something that could be very nice and useful at some point in the future. Today it’s something to play with, not something to use. That’s the kind way to say it. The direct way: It’s a toy.
Probably the “fairest” review I’ve read, and I have to add it in for some semblance of balance, but there are still more than enough negatives scattered through it!
Note to Time digital strategists: Sorry caching your site so I can take it with me when I’m on the move isn’t a feature worth your premium pricing.
“I just opened up my brand new iPad and was SHOCKED with what the internals looked like” via reddit