The Hat Bender

Flamed by alcohol last night, nostalgia was a hot topic for a good hour or so, and there was one person from primary school I fondly recalled; The Hat Bender.

You see, back in the day, basketball caps were all the rage, and there were three critical success factors to anyone’s basketball cap; it was a Starter, it had six stitches and just the right amount of bend.

The Starter label and six stitches were easy enough to obtain / verify, you just had to pay a premium until those dodgy Asian shops got the memo that eight stitches or four stitches were simply unacceptable.

The bend though, was the elusive part, and harder to get right. There were murmurings of mythical machines in the city that applied just the right amount of bend, but most of us didn’t frequent the city that often, so we had to make do with badly bent caps, and walked around with our heads hanging in shame, but at least protected from the sun.

This all changed one day though, when someone walked in with a new cap that was perfect! Everyone assumed The Kid scored a lucky break and got to meet The Machine, but he proclaimed that he could replicate this bend for a nominal amount.

The anticipation at little lunch [god bless the person that came up with that term] was high, but everyone was equally sceptical, and wondered what was so special about The Kid’s hands. Someone volunteered their hat, The Kid placed it on his knee, and 15 seconds later… *GASP*

Turns out The Kid’s knee was perfectly shaped for the job at hand and a star was born! I do remember him being quite the porker, so I’d like to send a belated thank you to his irresponsible parents.

Sadly, I can’t remember The Kid’s name, or even his face, but his knee has withstood the test of time.

P.S. My first was a Phoenix Suns cap.

P.P.S. Thank you mobile web.


4 thoughts on “The Hat Bender

  1. meh says:

    You were also a porker back in the day.I reckon you deserve a similar title to The Hat Bender but without the word ‘Hat’.

  2. caP_bender says:

    oh yea, I used to bend a few caps in my day. I went a bit higher up though – used the upper thigh rather than the knee to implement my bend. good blog couP

  3. c0uP says:

    It’s true, I blame my parents every day for my former porker status.Title-wise, I’m thinking more like ‘The Mind Bender’.Upper thigh could’ve worked too I guess, although it would’ve possibly been a little less firm.

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